New Things Are Weird

In this new reality, I have recently received an offer for a new job. Nothing I was explicitly looking for, but it will be good for me and mine.

Sharing the excitement about the job with family is part of the... well, excitement. But there was something, someone, decidedly missing this time around. To not be able to call my Dad about the job itself, or after the interview, or when I accepted... It just felt off. His personal encouragement and advice was missing from a narrative that has always previously been there.

In spite of all that, I could still hear his voice when I looked for parental approval. My Mom has it in spades and was, perhaps, doubly encouraging, but I could still somewhat hear what my Dad would say in this new adventure. Things about being positive, showing them what I know, learning from others, being proud of me. All things I've heard before, so it was a memory that I can latch on to.

It's just different, weird, not really being able to share it in the moment. I know it's the new normal, but it still doesn't feel normal. I still wanted to tell him about it, and hear his voice literally, not in my head.

Of course this is going to continue to happen, and I'm going to have to look to memories about what my Dad would say about various new adventures in my world. Thankfully I have many to choose from and can piece it together as needed. But it still won't ever be the same.